In the last few decades, women have progressed significantly in every sector; education has risen and is surpassing that of men; technology has changed domestic appliances, freeing women from backbreaking work. In turn, the bargaining position of women has increased inside the house due to the available opportunities outside the house.
But are they happy?
Considering the shift of power from men to women in the past few decades, holding everything else equal, it's been seen that the shift in women's well-being has fallen both absolutely and relatively compared to men. Blanchflower and Oswald (2004) have studied the trends of happiness and, over the period, have noted that women's happiness has been negative over the years.¹
There's a famous African proverb going around that says, “If you educate a man, you educate an individual. But if you educate a woman, you educate a nation.”
When women learn, they teach, pass it down to their generation, educate the family, and make society better. So if women start to imitate men and consider that they are equal to them and that birthing a child is an oppression, then they educate an individual instead of society.
Considering the shift of power from men to women in the past few decades, holding everything else equal, it's been seen that the shift in women's well-being has fallen both absolutely and relatively compared to men. Blanchflower and Oswald (2004) have studied the trends of happiness and, over the period, have noted that women's happiness has been negative over the years.¹
Akerlof, Yellen, and Katz (1996) “argue that sexual freedom offered by the birth control pill benefited men by increasing the pressure on women to have sex outside of marriage and reducing their bargaining power over a shotgun marriage in the face of an unwanted pregnancy.”²
“In addition to divorce, there has been an increase in the rate of children born out of wedlock that was concentrated in the 1960s and early 1990s. As a result of increases in both divorce and out-of-wedlock childbearing by age 15; about half of all children in the US are no longer living with both biological parents” (Elwood & Jencks, 2001).³
One more reason for women's happiness may be the comparison of their outcomes to those of men around them. Women's lives have become complex, and their well-being reflects their satisfaction with various aspects of life compared to the previous generation of women. For example, the happiness of women who are homemakers might reflect their satisfaction in their home compared to the happiness of women who are in both the labour force and a family at home.
“In addition to divorce, there has been an increase in the rate of children born out of wedlock that was concentrated in the 1960s and early 1990s. As a result of increases in both divorce and out-of-wedlock childbearing by age 15; about half of all children in the US are no longer living with both biological parents” (Elwood & Jencks, 2001).³
One more reason for women's happiness may be the comparison of their outcomes to those of men around them. Women's lives have become complex, and their well-being reflects their satisfaction with various aspects of life compared to the previous generation of women. For example, the happiness of women who are homemakers might reflect their satisfaction in their home compared to the happiness of women who are in both the labour force and a family at home.
What caused it?
Betty Friedman was an American feminist of second-wave feminism, also known for her book “The Feminine Mystique" (1963).
The book described that there's a large dissatisfaction among the housewives, and they cannot express their feelings. This book has influenced millions of women to prioritize their careers first, and now in developed or developing countries, women are taking full part in leadership in politics, business advancement, and other professions.
Betty Friedman was an American feminist of second-wave feminism, also known for her book “The Feminine Mystique" (1963).
The book described that there's a large dissatisfaction among the housewives, and they cannot express their feelings. This book has influenced millions of women to prioritize their careers first, and now in developed or developing countries, women are taking full part in leadership in politics, business advancement, and other professions.
But later, Friedman did a survey and found out that 1/3 of the women are actually unhappy and are exposed to mental breakdowns. According to this, the mother of feminism herself admits that things got worse instead of better, and if she had the chance, she would have stopped it.
The feminist icon of the 20th century, Germaine Greer, created the feminist myth that childbearing is a plot to keep women enslaved. In the British magazine Aura, it was headlined, "I Was Desperate for a Baby, and I Have the Medical Bills to Prove It." Krauthammer, an American columnist, asks, "Some love-struck movie star? A lesbian celebrity? Nope! It was Germaine Greer herself!
She now “mourns for her unborn babies” and confesses, “I still have pregnancy dreams, waiting with vast joy and confidence for something that will never happen.” In The Whole Woman, she writes, “In The Female Eunuch, I argued that motherhood should not be treated as a substitute career; now I would argue that motherhood should be regarded as a genuine career option.” She says the “immense rewardingness of children is the best kept secret in the Western world.”
She now “mourns for her unborn babies” and confesses, “I still have pregnancy dreams, waiting with vast joy and confidence for something that will never happen.” In The Whole Woman, she writes, “In The Female Eunuch, I argued that motherhood should not be treated as a substitute career; now I would argue that motherhood should be regarded as a genuine career option.” She says the “immense rewardingness of children is the best kept secret in the Western world.”
The consequences of second-wave feminism:
These women, who influenced millions of other women into thinking that they were being oppressed by staying at home and providing for their families, are now longing for that life.
In the biggest survey between 1970 and 1990, there were 80% of the women who wanted to quit working and were unhappy. Are there 80% of women who want to stop being mothers? No.
These women, who influenced millions of other women into thinking that they were being oppressed by staying at home and providing for their families, are now longing for that life.
In the biggest survey between 1970 and 1990, there were 80% of the women who wanted to quit working and were unhappy. Are there 80% of women who want to stop being mothers? No.
Somewhere between the right to work, education, and being a mother, women started considering that they couldn't have both at the same time and that their education was meaningless if they formed a family.
There's a famous African proverb going around that says, “If you educate a man, you educate an individual. But if you educate a woman, you educate a nation.”
When women learn, they teach, pass it down to their generation, educate the family, and make society better. So if women start to imitate men and consider that they are equal to them and that birthing a child is an oppression, then they educate an individual instead of society.
The women who have never experienced motherhood and are told by others that working for someone else is better than having a family and nurturing is like a prison, whereas the women working are in an actual prison. A mother can willingly die for her child; that's how much a mother loves their children, but how many can die for the company they are working for?
Then on what basis having a child and a job are compared? This doesn't mean a woman should always be at home isolated from society, but this is how it is portrayed by the so-called feminists.
Then on what basis having a child and a job are compared? This doesn't mean a woman should always be at home isolated from society, but this is how it is portrayed by the so-called feminists.
Who will take care of women if they don't work?
The feminist movement has benefited men in various aspects of life. For instance, the sole responsibility of the house and children has decreased; more and more children are being born out of wedlock; divorce rates are constantly increasing; and financial needs have been divided.
A woman taking care of the family has enough responsibilities, as it takes a major toll on her physical and psychological health. It takes 9 months for a woman to form a baby, and it takes 6–12 months for the body to completely heal and get back to normal. During these periods, the woman needs the utmost care and rest, and to ask them to go out and work is straight-up cruel.
During childhood, the child needs care, nurturing, love, and constant attention from the mother, and if the mother fails to be present, then it affects the child.
A mother is also the first mentor in the child's life; hence, it's necessary for the woman to be properly educated to teach their children.
These are the reasons why women should be present at home while the men are working and providing, but in certain cases, there is no father and the mother has to work to provide, and it's completely normal too. In such cases, the grandparents of the children can look out for them, which highlights the importance of the relationships.
If the woman keeps on working and doesn't want a kid, and the husband doesn't have any responsibility to take care of anybody, there will be distance between the two, leading to disloyalty and conflicts. Why should women get depressed during the day when they have the option to be completely satisfied with life and be provided for? Being a housewife is a privilege and necessity for a woman, it's not a ‘comfortable concentration camp’, it's a comfortable home.
The feminist movement has benefited men in various aspects of life. For instance, the sole responsibility of the house and children has decreased; more and more children are being born out of wedlock; divorce rates are constantly increasing; and financial needs have been divided.
A woman taking care of the family has enough responsibilities, as it takes a major toll on her physical and psychological health. It takes 9 months for a woman to form a baby, and it takes 6–12 months for the body to completely heal and get back to normal. During these periods, the woman needs the utmost care and rest, and to ask them to go out and work is straight-up cruel.
During childhood, the child needs care, nurturing, love, and constant attention from the mother, and if the mother fails to be present, then it affects the child.
A mother is also the first mentor in the child's life; hence, it's necessary for the woman to be properly educated to teach their children.
These are the reasons why women should be present at home while the men are working and providing, but in certain cases, there is no father and the mother has to work to provide, and it's completely normal too. In such cases, the grandparents of the children can look out for them, which highlights the importance of the relationships.
If the woman keeps on working and doesn't want a kid, and the husband doesn't have any responsibility to take care of anybody, there will be distance between the two, leading to disloyalty and conflicts. Why should women get depressed during the day when they have the option to be completely satisfied with life and be provided for? Being a housewife is a privilege and necessity for a woman, it's not a ‘comfortable concentration camp’, it's a comfortable home.
[1] Blanchflower, D. G., & Oswald, A. J. (2004). Money, sex and happiness: An empirical study. Scandinavian Journal of Economics, 106(3), 393-415. doi:10.1111/j.0347-0520.2004.00369.x
[2] Akerlof, G. A., Yellen, J. L., & Katz, M. L. (1996). An analysis of out-of-wedlock childbearings in the United States. The Quarterly Journal of Economics, 111(2), 277-317. doi:10.1162/003355396555500
[3] Elwood, D. T., & Jencks, C. (2001). The spread of single-parent families in the United States since 1960. In L. B. Wilson & S. Neckerman (Eds.), Poverty, inequality, and the future of social policy (pp. 25-65). Russell Sage Foundation.